EVERYTHING IS GARBAGE. JUST COME TAKE SOME FELT. WE WONT STOP YOU.

  1. Fuck, dude. The world is fucking terrifying.
  2. We just pounded some boxed wine with crushed Ativan mixed in. It's called a Savannah Guthrie.
  3. We know how much everyone's hurting. We really do. But you know what? We're gonna sack up and do something about it.
  4. Just come in and take some fucking felt. We won't lift a finger to stop you.
  5. Use it to make a hat. Or a stuffed dragon. Or whatever other bullshit you want. We don't care.
  6. We have MUCH bigger things to worry about.
  7. All felt free. Fuck it, take some beads, too. Nothing matters. Only at Jo-Ann Fabrics.