SOMEONE TOOK A SHIT IN ALL THE CUPCAKE BOXES AT STORE CA-118
- •We just heard from our manager that someone snuck into the store last night and took a shit in EVERY SINGLE CUPCAKE BOX IN THE STORE.
- •Seriously, what kind of sick fucking animal decides to drop trou and squeeze one out in a box meant for adorable cakes? Is that just something people do in Fresno?
- •Hey, dickhole, if you're out there reading this, we at Jo-Ann Fabrics have a message for ya.
- •WE WILL FIND YOU.
- •WE WILL HURT YOU.
- •WE WILL FEED YOU TO THE TIGER WE PROMOTED TO ASSISTANT MANAGER.
- •WE WILL FUCKING END YOU.
- •So laugh it up, butt-nugget, 'cause that's the last shit you're ever taking in your life.
- •On a related note, all floor-model cupcake boxes are now half off. In-store only.