WE'RE SICK AND FUCKING TIRED OF GIVING YOU PRICKS DISCOUNTS. DECORATIVE BIRDCAGES ARE NOW 80% MORE

  1. What, you think we're fucking idiots?
  2. We know how much money you save buying our decorative birdcages. But do we ever get thanked for it?
  3. No. No we fucking don't.
  4. Commerce is a two-way street, shit-stains. And we're tired of bending over and letting John Q Public have it's way with our discounts.
  5. Effectively immediately, all decorative birdcages are now 80% more than their advertised price.
  6. And you know what? You're gonna pay it.
  7. Because you NEED us.
  8. We save you the shame of having to admit you've given up on life by stepping foot in a Michaels or, God forbid, a Hobby Lobby.
  9. And until you start being grateful for all we've given you, you're gonna have to pay the price.
  10. Decorative birdcages: 80% more than usual. Only at Jo-Ann Fabrics.