Things I've taken that weren't really mine to have.
  1. A roll of Life Savers from a supermarket when I was around 8
    Static
    The flavors were cherry, lemon, orange, and guilt.
  2. A tape dispenser from a previous job
    Static
    They "job eliminated" a dozen people that day, including me. I felt justified "office supply-eliminating" them.
  3. Extra plastic bags from the supermarket
    Static
    I have a number of cats, so we can definitely call this recycling.
  4. My kids' French fries
    Static
    Not technically illegal. It's in the "Dad's Official Rights & Privileges" handbook.
  5. Things I placed in the lower part of my cart at Target that I forgot to put on the conveyor belt when I checked out
    Static
    Not intentional, but did I give them back? Ummmm...
  6. The blanket
    Static
  7. Malted milk balls at Whole Foods
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    Every once in a while, my wife and I would just dispense a couple and eat them inconspicuously.
  8. Extra Splenda packets from various coffee houses
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    Given what they charge me for coffee, I don't feel too bad about this.
  9. Hotel amenities
    Static
    Never a towel, but plenty of unopened shampoo bottles, conditioners, moisturizers, and shoe sponges I took on my way out.
  10. My parents' time
    Static
    I yammered a lot as a kid.