Seven Types of Airplane Passengers Who Make Me Feel Safer

I'm sure being in a plane crash is rare and random, but these things do comfort me somewhat.
  1. 1.
    Priests or Nuns
    I'm not particularly religious, but just in case I'm wrong...
  2. 2.
    Another Pilot Who's a Passenger
    A passenger-pilot makes me feel very safe, as if he has the ability to choose safer flights. It's also nice to know there's a second pilot... just in case. But I'll never look at him. It's one thing to see a nervous passenger, but another to see a pilot whose expression says "something isn't right."
  3. 3.
    It just seems like God wouldn't be so cruel as to let something bad happen to a little kid. Though if the kid is really misbehaving, I begin to think it's more likely something bad will happen. Even Santa has a naughty list.
  4. 4.
    Thinking about Sully
    Sometimes, everyone lives to talk about it.
  5. 5.
    A Celebrity of Any Stature
    It just seems unlikely something bad would happen to me AND a celebrity on the same flight. On my plane from Austin yesterday, Erik "The Lizardman" Sprague was aboard, and even he made me feel calmer.
  6. 6.
    A Mild Mannered Tough Guy
    Even if he's not an Air Marshall, he can probably put down a hijacker or three if the situation calls for it.
  7. 7.
    A Beautiful Woman
    Doesn't make me feel safer so much as simply distract me.