1. DOCTOR: a new study says the meds ur on cause hallucinations ME: oh... LARGE MENACING CACTUS THAT FOLLOWS ME EVERYWHERE: was it peer reviewed?
  2. [animal convention] "let's talk survival strategies" CHEETAH: be fast JELLYFISH: sting everything [from the back] BUTTERFLY: be beautiful
  3. [being mugged] ME: can I keep things of sentimental value ROBBER: ok ME:[pulling things from wallet] my favorite cash...my lucky debit card