Updating the "Love Is Patient" Verse for 2017
Happy V Day everyone.
- •Love is patientWhen you try to explain the plot of Westworld.
- •Love is kindWhen your tweet doesn't go viral like you dreamed it would.
- •It does not envyExcept when it sees Instagram pics of one of its college classmates going on a seemingly never-ending, world-encompassing vacation that DEFINITELY includes elephants.
- •It does not boastBecause marathoning all 5 seasons of "Call the Midwife" in 2 days is not something to boast about.
- •It is not proudBecause pride implies dignity, and it's last shred of dignity was ripped from it after that 3rd season of "Call the Midwife."
- •It does not dishonor othersInstead, it laughs thinking about how the word "dishonor" reminds it of Mushu in Mulan. Then it cries because it's childhood is over and it's not completely on board with the whole Frozen-started-the-second-Disney-Renaissance trend.
- •It is not self-seekingOkay.
- •It is not easily angeredEven when you don't respond to texts but then tweet like 6 times.
- •It keeps no record of wrongsIt deletes those screenshots for YOU.
- •Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truthAfter extensively verifying that that truth isn't fake news.
- •It always protectsKate McKinnon and the kids from "Stranger Things."
- •Always trustsAny Atlanta sports team to trip at the finish line.
- •Always hopesThat we don't all die in the next 4 years.
- •Always perseveresEven when li.st rolls out an update that makes your phone actually catch on fire whenever you try to publish a gif list.