ALL-PURPOSE COMPREHENSIVE STAR WARS SPOILERS

  1. There are planes that go in space
  2. There are planes that go in the air
  3. There are spaceplanes which also go in the air
  4. Some planets have sand
  5. Some planets have water
  6. Some planets have clouds
  7. Some planets have forests
  8. Some planets have snow
  9. Some planets have mountains
  10. Some planets have moons
  11. Some moons are not moons: they are battle stations
  12. There are goodies
  13. There are baddies
  14. The goodies and the baddies fight
  15. They fight with lazer swords
  16. They fight with lazer guns
  17. They fight with lazer guns on their spaceplanes
  18. The baddies use battle stations to blow up planets
  19. The goodies use spaceplanes to blow up battle stations
  20. The goodies always win
  21. There are robots
  22. There are people
  23. Some robots look like people, but are still robots
  24. Some people look like robots, but are still people
  25. Some people don’t look like people or robots: they are aliens
  26. The people say words
  27. The robots say words or make funny noises
  28. The aliens say words or make funny noises
  29. Everybody can understand the words and funny noises
  30. Some people can do magic
  31. Some aliens can do magic
  32. Robots can’t do magic
  33. There is good magic and bad magic
  34. The bad magic fights the good magic
  35. * The good magic always wins