Here's What I Don't Need
The first in an ongoing series
- •Food reviews that include the word "yummy"
- •TVs that automatically get darker when you turn the lights out
- •News headlines in the form of questions
- •Wacky porn
- •Bluetooth connection troubles
- •Someone to "keep me on my toes"
- •Unplanned Face Time calls
- •The word "frankly"
- •Photos of someone holding a sneaker to their ear like a phone
- •Fishing the pierced-yet-unused Nespresso pod out of the dungeon of otherwise spent casings