Fictional Non-Fiction Best Sellers

Titles of books that I wish I could write
  1. The Thing About Buttholes Is..
    A whimsical collection of humorous, informative, and inspirational essays about the anus.
  2. From Donald to Michelle
    How Donald Trump's unexpected and disastrous Presidency led to Michelle Obama's historical and prosperous Presidency.
  3. Wu Tang is for the Children
    Life lessons from the hip-hop legends presented as fables for elementary aged children.
  4. Thoughts Arrive Like Butterflies
    Examining the deep philosophical and spiritual messages in 1990s grunge & alt rock music.
  5. The Masturbator (And other tales of sex and life)
    Autobiographical stories focusing on my sex life. Sometimes sad, sometimes funny, and occasionally even sexy.
  6. Balls
    A book about my obsession with sports.
  7. I Can Even
    Motivational essays for millennials.