Items every gym should have, but doens't have

  1. 1.
    The Exalibur weight.
    A weight so heavy only that one semi-pro dead lifter that works out in your gym can lift. Saves all of us other not so skilled guys (and gals) assembling a weight that we can't lift and then have to disassemble again. Just have it there to stare in our faces so that we train harder.
  2. 2.
    The balance rower
    Yes I can row on the indoor rowing machine 5k in half an hour. Then I go to an actual lake and fall in because the boat is all wobbly. Fix that! Make indoor rowers also wobbly so we can train on gracefully entering and leaving a rowing boat.
  3. 3.
    The Thai foamroller
    Two editions, one with a dildo glued on for the women, and one with a fleshlight glued in for the men. So that you can foamroll yourself to a happy end. For the moaning noises these additions will not make a difference.