THINGS I'M WORRIED ABOUT WHILE MY GF GETS A BIKINI WAX

  1. That she and her waxer are making fun of all my gross stuff
  2. That she and her waxer will forget I'm waiting out here and will go to lunch together and I will never leave Bliss Spa
  3. That she's going to break up with me
  4. That she and her waxer are laughing about all the fun she and her freshly shorn vagina will have with guys after breaking up with me.
  5. That she will make me go into advertising
  6. That my girlfriend speaks Russian and has never disclosed this to me
  7. That there are secret vagina things I don't know about that she and her waxer are rolling their eyes over (probably also in Russian)
  8. That I am the only man in this waiting area