1. Mum: I received a call this morning for you from your university.
  2. Me: My university? Really?
    I finished uni a few years ago. No idea why they'd be calling.
  3. Mum: Yeah, they just wanted to check your contact details for the illumini.
  4. Me: The illumini?
  5. Mum: Yes, the illumini.
  6. [Pause]
  7. [More pausing]
  8. Me: The alumni?
  9. Mum: Yeah, that sounds more like it.
  10. Such a shame, for a moment I thought I was being contacted by the illuminati regarding potential membership.