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Who needs a list of resolutions when I could just indulge in unhealthy habits and numbly binge watch my way through twelve months?
  1. Everybody Loves Raymond
    I just finished Parenthood (2010) and now I just feel like my life is somehow lesser without Ray Romano. So, here I go, nine seasons.
  2. The Newsroom
    If I'm actually considering a career in Broadcast Journalism, I might as well let Aaron Sorkin color my opinion of the profession. Also, I hear it's really good.
  3. Westworld
    I don't like not understanding my classy friends' Westworld references.
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Don't even talk to me about these things.
  1. Cornbread
    Disgusting. Worthless. Should not exist.
  2. Baz Luhrmann Films
    Moulin Rogue isn't even that good. Please stop making me watch it. I'm not gonna cry when tHE STORY IS NOT COHESIVE AND THE CHARACTERIZATION IS NONEXISTENT.
  3. Chris Messina w/ that scraggly beard and mustache combo
    It makes him look like Chewbacca on a good day and just tragic on a bad day. Someone should stop him. Also someone needs to tell Ben Affleck to stop enabling him.
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The trials and tribulations of a college student stranded in Eastern Iowa.
  1. It's always windy.
    The wind never stops. The wind in Iowa has literally knocked me down. And it has knocked me off the sidewalk and into the road more times than I care to count. And you can't even hold an umbrella when it's raining without it collapsing on itself at least three times in the fifteen minute walk to class. Also, it's so windy in the winter that the snow on ground blows up and smacks me in the face when I'm walking. FUCK THE WIND.
  2. IT'S FUCKING COLD AS SHIT
    Today it is a balmy 14 degrees. Which translates to -4 degrees with 22 mph and goddamn Midwestern wind chill. This is actually pretty warm for Iowa.
  3. THE WIND CHILL MIGHT ACTUALLY BE THE CAUSE OF MY DEATH.
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Accept your fate and swear to yourself you'll never do this again. Except you totally will.
  1. It's in the morning.
  2. You are awake before 5 AM.
    The only other people awake are people doing the walk of shame and you doing the ultimate walk of shame through bag check and security lines. Also, your grandma, your grandma is probably awake too.
  3. You have to be at the damn airport an hour or MORE before your flight. So you are up way before 5 AM. Try 3 AM.
    Factor in how far you live from your airport and the hour you need to get through security. Once you do this, cry profusely. Like should you even go to bed?
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