HOW TO BE AN ARTIST

If you want to tap into your inner soul and pull out the artist that lives and breathes within yourself, then this list is for you.
  1. Have daddy issues
    It's important for every artist to have problems with their family life, specifically with their fathers. If you do not have any conflict with your father, come out as gay. This will more than likely upset him.
  2. Hate the world
    When it comes to being an artist, it is crucial that you have a struggle with the world around you. You must hate everything but you, because you are the best and if others don't think so, than there must be something wrong them. So hate them and everyone like them. The world is out to get you. Run
  3. Hate yourself
    Being an artist involves many contradictions, you must believe that you are the best and believe you are the worst at the same time. You have to hate every fiber of your being, hate the existence you have been forced to have. You have to want punch the mirror every time you stare into it.
  4. Do drugs
    In order to cope with the daily struggles of being a selfish ass hole, you have to turn to drugs in order to forget about the life you are forced to live. Do every drug you can get your miserable hands on, because nothing will satisfy the need to escape from your horrible life.
  5. Go crazy
    A crucial step in becoming an artist is loosing touch with reality. You must completely dive into yourself and forget what's real and what's fake. Stare into your hands and wonder, am I moving them or is the cloaked man in the corner moving them. Who am I?
  6. Do art sometimes
    A very small part of being an artist is doing art. You have to do as little art as you possibly can, only do enough so that someone can tell the difference between you and a homeless drug addict.
  7. Give up, please