Crimes Against Humanity I Personally Witnessed Last Night, Ranked

December 17, 2016 will go down in infamy
  1. 7.
    Two Uber drivers cancelling on me last minute
    WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO DRIVE FROM MID-WILSHIRE TO TORRANCE ON A SATURDAY NIGHT?????¿¿¿¿?? (Okay I get this one)
  2. 6.
    Torrance police officers blocking traffic to drive their non-denominational winter holiday float at 15 mph down the main drag at 8pm on a Saturday night
    THIS IS NEITHER PROTECTING NOR SERVING LADIES AND GENTLEMEN
  3. 5.
    A partygoer dropping a full Coors Light on the floor and not cleaning it up himself
    HOW RUDE
  4. 4.
    A 22 year old being cornered at a party and questioned about what kind of girl he was looking for, as if we were his mothers/yentas
    Okay this was partially me I am repenting as we speak
  5. 3.
    Target shoppers abandoning their carts in open parking spots
    Guys it just isn't that hard to return your cart and it helps your fellow shoppers and the Target employees (all of whom are just as weary, exhausted, and frustrated as you) pLEASE!!!!!!
  6. 2.
    No Irish whiskey at the bar.......
    (The tip of the fucking iceberg dudes)
  7. 1.
    ......the CASH BAR at my company's holiday party
    Can you even IMAGINE