THE TIME I WAS ON CARMEX

Like totally addicted to it
  1. 20 years ago when I was In college, I started using CARMEX.
  2. A friend kept talking about how it made her lips tingle.
  3. I thought, "Tingle huh? That sounds fun."
  4. Soon i was using it a couple times AN HOUR.
  5. My lips were so used to the tingle that they simply craved it. I think there's a menthol in it or something. But boy did I need that stuff.
  6. So one weekend my dads all you need to get off CARMEX. Like go cold turkey and just quit.
  7. I did and my lips dried up like a desert. They were so used to all this extra moisture that they were like in a drought all of a sudden.
  8. I switched to regular old Chapstick just to give my lips a little moisture. And now I've never been better.
  9. Every now and then I see some CARMEX in a store and wonder if I could handle it. Then I think Nah. Better not.