THINGS I CAN'T GET OFF MY MIND

My mind has been reeling for what feels like weeks now so I just gotta get it out
  1. My move back home
    There's like 100's of sub categories here but I am SO. OVER. Michigan!!! I've been here for 6 years, I did my part I graduated college worked a lil bit made some great friends but seriously I need to get the fuck out of this place ASAP
  2. WHY am I still not doing the things I want to do?!!!!
    I made a New Years resolution of doing the things I want to do regardless of whether or not someone wants to do it with me. And I re-did my work schedules to have weekends off and I'm STILL not doing these things? Like it was gorgeous out today and I spent all day thinking about how nice it would be to go to the little nature area near us and what did I do?!! Sat on the couch and watched 15 year old episodes of fear factor all day
  3. I need to find a real fucking job
    I love being a parapro, but I need to find and land a teaching position! I'm losing my mind being an adult in a classroom and having no say in how anything goes.
  4. All the things I'm missing out on
    It's SO HARD being 1000 miles from all your friends and family and seeing everything through a screen. I missed my neice riding her tricycle for the first time, I miss my fucking sister, I see constant snaps of all my friends hanging out and having a great time. It's so depressing
  5. Quitting my current job
    I finally sucked it up and told the principal I was moving back home and he was super understanding and within 3 days had already written me a letter of recommendation but I have yet to tell any of the teachers cuz I love them all and they love me and I don't want to disappoint them 😭
  6. $$$$
    I'm struggling always and I'm contemplating getting a 3rd job again but I just don't know if I want to give up happiness and freedom for money (THOUGH!!! If I did have more money - I would feel more happiness and freedom..........)
  7. I'm just really at a low point right now and I'm halfway trying to claw my way out and halfway digging the hole deeper