THE DAY YOU DECIDE YOU DESERVE BETTER

  1. Isn't like any other day.
  2. Maybe it's a weekday, maybe you awaken early for work or school.
    Maybe it's a weekend, your only alarm the birds and the sun.
  3. You don't immediately hate what you see in the mirror.
    Even if you still have acne scars, even if your clumsy bruises haven't quite faded, even if your hips and breasts are striped with stretch marks.
  4. In fact, you might become fond of the way your hair curls in all different directions, untameable by any comb.
  5. You might finally see the blueness in your eyes your mother has sworn beautiful but you've never seen anything more than bland.
  6. You don't argue with yourself about the fact you wanted toast instead of fruit, you don't look at the calorie count on your juice.
  7. You leave the house not because you have to but because you can.
  8. You may encounter someone or something that reminds you of a time when you didn't think you deserved better.
    Maybe that friend who treated you so poorly but who you still clung to as if they were the only person who would ever love you.
  9. You may catch their gaze and wonder if you should ask, one more time, if they'll give you a second chance.
  10. You may feel the urge so strong that you think you might be sick if you don't get the words out fast enough.
  11. Perhaps, you may (you might) come so close that they start to turn away.
  12. You could grab them and ask them to please forgive you for the sin of being you.
  13. But you don't.
  14. Because this is the day you decide you deserve better.
  15. Maybe even the best.