The worst day as a pet foster carer isn't the day you send them back to be rehomed, actually.
  1. We sent back the litter of foster kittens I wrote a list about a little while ago.
  2. We even had a prearranged home for Thomas.
    Which is super rare and so amazing, being able to send them off knowing they have their future secured.
  3. It was the first time in a long time I didn't cry when we left the shelter.
  4. Maybe because I was excited for the next litter we'd have.
    And do. One of them is making our lives miserable by not eating but he'll get there.
  5. Maybe because this is becoming routine.
  6. I don't know.
  7. But now the tears are flowing.
  8. For the first time in two years, after more that thirty kittens and cats have passed through our homes, one of them died.
  9. We don't really know what happened.
    She was desexed and eating fine and then she wasn't.
  10. Sometimes these things just do.
  11. And she wasn't "my" cat, so maybe I don't have the right to be so sad.
  12. But I am.
  13. She was just a baby.
    She loved having her head scratched more than anything, it was the one way you could break down her shy nature and make her purr.
  14. She would have been easily adopted, she was so pretty.
  15. But she's gone.
  16. And this is why being a foster carer can be a really fucking tough job.
  17. Because eventually, the inevitable happens.
    And it feels like your fault.
  18. Rest peacefully, Lily.
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    I hope we made your little life a good one.