One of the five-year-old twins I care for asked for my permission to lie to people on the bus today. I was curious enough to allow it. We spent two hours round trip on the bus. Here are SOME of the lies X told strangers today:
  1. "We're taking the bus because my mom is a teenager and she's too young to get a driver's license or a car. This is how we always get around."
  2. "I live at an orphanage and this is the only time I've ever been allowed to leave. This lady is taking pity on me and bringing me to PDX Playdate. I've never had a good day in my whole life."
    (PDX Playdate is an indoor jungle gym in Portland and it is in fact the reason we were on the bus.)
  3. "I like to put Play Doh in my penis for fun."
  4. "This is my mom. She prefers it when I call her by her name so people don't know she has kids. That's why we have to call her 'Kamina'."
    (I'm the nanny.)
  5. "I had a surgery to remove my brain because it didn't work very well. They put a metal brain in my head and now I'm doing better, but I have to run on gasoline and it's not very efficient. Oh well. Too late now."