CROCK POT TIPS, STYLE #1

This was the first style I learned and it's incredibly adaptable.
  1. But a huge rock of meat.
    Lamb, pork, or beef are best. Bone in is the very best.
  2. Buy all those freaky root vegetables you see in the store.
    Rutabaga, parsnips, oddball winter squash, purple yams -- just go for it.
  3. Peel those veggie freaks and put them at the bottom of the crock pot.
    Make sure you have a little more meat than the veggies.
  4. Gather absurd amounts of herbs from your herb garden.
    I'm talking like 3 cups at least after being plucked off the stems and chopped. Over wintered herbs are great: sage, rosemary, oregano, summer savory, thyme, etc. Save your fresh basil for something else.
  5. Make a little bowl of white wine, apricot nectar, curry, a shit ton of fresh chopped garlic (10 cloves?) and all those herbs.
    Stir it around. It smells weird, doesn't it?
  6. Put your meat rock on that bed of dark veggies.
    That's what she said.
  7. Pour your wine curry cocktail all over the meat rock.
    She also said that.
  8. Put a few small branches of herbs in top of everything.
    This is very impressive to the lookie-loos who will be around later wondering what's cooking.
  9. Put a lid on it and put that fucker on "low."
  10. Wait 8-10 hours.
    This is when the magic happens.
  11. Whoa, look. Where did the day go? Everything is different now. The sun is setting. Remember that wine? Get it back out of the fridge and pour some in a glass.
    You earned this.
  12. Tell everyone in the house that it's time.
    They'll smell it. They'll know what you mean.
  13. Scoop out the meat, potatoes, and sauce that miraculously was created into a bowl-like plate.
    Bowl-like plates are perfect for this.
  14. Add salt to taste, fresh ground pepper, and a HUGE dollop of fatty Greek yogurt.
    The yogurt part is very important.
  15. Eat.
    Enjoy!