BEVERAGE PAIRING FOR PARENTS

I saw a wine pairing blog post for when your children are monsters, but sometimes wine isn't fast enough.
  1. Barbecue = beer
    It's perfectly acceptable to drink a beer (or eight) while your children run amok around someone else's yard.
  2. Homework = red wine
    If it's the beginning of the school year and you're Type A (like BOTH of us, for a shock), you'll need a glass of red wine to remember that the handwriting only needs to be good enough for the teacher to read it and a wrong answer will alert the teacher that she doesn't understand the concept.
  3. Group dinner with the ex = screwdriver
    Yay! Your favorite activity is spending time with your former spouse or your spouse's former spouse, so put some orange juice and vodka in a water bottle and down it right before you go in.
  4. Transition day = rum
    You're excited to get them back, but know this day is rough for them (and you, if you're the strict household). Rum is festive and takes the edge off!
  5. Board games = hard ginger beer
    Because the 10 year-old is already rolling her eyes, the 8 year-old is going to change the rules, and the baby is going to eat the game pieces/choking hazards.
  6. Meltdown before bed = shot of Patron
    It's going to be a long night.