1. The first class I ever taught just graduated high school
  2. My metabolism has slowed WAY down
  3. I make the corny jokes that I rolled my eyes at when I was young
    And I like really really laugh at them
  4. I now get annoyed when teens roll their eyes at me
  5. Your son tells you you're reaching the "cold stage of life"
    When you're in your twenties you're hot, your thirties are warm, and your forties are cold. I did not want to ask what any of it means
  6. I get so much joy from a well made bed
    I mean just look at this sexy thing. Also, your daughter steals this comforter because it's "too young for you" whatever that means!