THE SECRET LANGUAGE OF GIRLS
- •"I can't stay up and watch gymnastics I have to run tomorrow morning"I mean...what? She seriously went to bed before Laurie Hernandez and Simone Biles went on the beam. What fresh hell is this?
- •"It isn't hard, it's just a recovery run"First, you used "isn't hard" talking about running, so I'm already lost. And "recovery"? What does that mean? That you have to recover after you do it?
- •"It's only twenty minutes"Did you say ONLY? How long is a "regular" run? Oh, don't tell me. I don't want to know. Also, who is forcing you to do this?
- •"I only ran three miles today"Oh. Is that all? Just THREE miles? I don't even know what to say to that. Wait, I think I can act shocked and disappointed.
- •"My size incredibly small shorts are too big"I guess that's what happens when you run more than three miles every day and don't sit on your couch all day eating everything. I should probably learn from her and start running. But I'll think I'll just list about it and eat some more snacks.