Things that happen right before the Family Easter Lunch

  1. Mom is already calling me about the menu
    And it's EIGHT AM on a SATURDAY. So I'm ready to cancel the whole thing
  2. She's letting me know I'm not really prepared
    "Do you have enough cloth napkins?" Translation: will we be eating out of a trough like farm animals?
  3. My brothers have asked to change the time
    They live three and a half hours away so I get the drive isn't pleasant. But commit to a time please or just say you can't make it. Just stop torturing me
  4. The adults want the "kids" to hunt eggs
    But there's only two egg hunting aged kids in the family. And honestly they're not really egg hunting age anymore. So I told the adults they can hunt the eggs if they really want a damn egg hunt
  5. My dad is asking if the ex husband will be here
    He attends most family functions for the sake of the kids. But I'm sure not having to is one of the divorce perks. Also, I know my father is still holding out hope that we will get back together.
  6. They have already started asking if the "boyfriend" will be here
    I don't know when they're going to get that for the sake of the kids he doesn't come to family functions until they ask for him to come. They haven't. So he doesn't join us. Also I like him and I don't want to expose him to the family drama. But they're going to ask anyway. Non stop. Over and over.