THINGS SAID IN THE OFFICE TODAY

  1. Was I drunk?
  2. I ate my lunch for breakfast. I got a jump on lunch.
  3. I don't even like traveling with people I like.
  4. Look at all these owls!
  5. He was being unreasonable but also funny.
  6. Last night a Big Mac saved my life.
  7. I'm going to start a 600 person email chain.
  8. Thank you for your excellent stewardship of last night's festivities.
  9. Thank you for your excellent Sewardship of being yourself.
  10. Halloween is important to me.
  11. If you throw your wang out at 7:30, that's okay.
  12. My mouth is connected to my eyeballs.