THINGS I WOULD HAVE TO HIDE FROM MY MOM

Because otherwise I'd get an earful from her.
  1. Tattoos
    Not that I would get one. But she also strongly believes that people with henna tattoos look like convicts.
  2. Alcohol/alcohol breath
    With the exception of wine, champagne, and a frozen margarita.
  3. Identities of guys I have dated/am currently dating
  4. Tan lines
    "Not in a million years is my daughter going to get dark!"