1. Drinking my morning coffee makes me poop
  2. Just smelling my morning coffee sometimes makes me poop
  3. Hours passing after a meal makes me poop
  4. If you rub my belly, I'll poop
  5. Eating three graham crackers and not eating the fourth one fast enough makes me poop
  6. The doctor calling me bad dog makes me poop
  7. Holding a poop in for forty five minutes will just result in pooping
  8. Terrorists who take my family hostage and ask me to poop in a jar make me poop
  9. Scary jars make me poop
  10. I have to poop when I'm watching Fargo and the Mike Yanagita scene comes up
  11. If you hold me upside down I'll poop out of my mouth
  12. If it's third grade I'll poop my pants
  13. Not wearing pants makes me poop right away. Classic Pavlov!
  14. Looking at this picture makes me poop
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  15. Lists don't make me poop but I like writing lists while pooping
  16. Yo bitch-ass mama makes me poop
  17. David Seger's emoji list makes me 💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩