WHAT I WANTED TO BE GROWING UP, CHRONOLOGICALLY

  1. Age 5-7 Dolly Parton/Tennessee dept of transportation. Or in child terms " people in charge of the roads." Wtf?
  2. Age 7-11 Own horse ranch.
  3. Age 11-13 Britney Spears
  4. Age 13-15 ambulance driver (theres that road domination thing again. Wtf.)
  5. Age 15-16 Professional soccer player
  6. Age 16-18 Professional loser and part time "white trash beautiful" (love that song) best live in girlfriend ever to my first and horrifically scarring and emotionally abusive first love. Eeek dont even know who that girl was!
  7. Age 18-19 Professional loser/didnt really give a fuck about life at this point in life. ( following break up with first love)
  8. Age19-20 Life of the party
  9. Age 21 Teacher. (following spiraling breakdown of "woah this party thing is gonna get me nowhere.")
  10. Age 22 Britney Spears (fuck college)
  11. Age 23 Lawyer (someone mentioned that and i ran wayy to far with it)
  12. Age 24-present Britney Spears, would even settle for "backup dancer."