I love people... well I love most people but not all of them... okay just kidding people suck.
  1. You sit down and immediately say you're gonna hate us.
    Mmmmm probably.
  2. Hi, How is everyone doing this eveni...
    I'll take a Diet Coke.
  3. Or even better the... hi, how is everyone doing this evening?
    Complete silence
  4. Or walking up and patiently waiting for them to finish their sentence
    Only to have them look up, see you, and continue on a different subject...
  5. Eat their entire meal and then complain
    This one irks me because either you're trying to get free shit orrrr you didn't like it but were too nervous/ didn't want to be rude. But I want you to like it! I want you to come back! Tell us when we have time to fix it. Also when you tell us after the fact we have to go to our manager and assure them that yes we did check on you. No they didn't say anything. Yes I am doing my job.
  6. Talk over me while I explain specials and soups
    Then ask what the special and soups are individually as I go around the table.
  7. One time me
    Every time I come to the table ask for one thing at a time. Can I get a side of ranch? Of course! Come back with ranch. Can I get a side of tartar? Sure! Come back with tartar. Can I get an extra napkin... ASK FOR IT ALL AT ONCE PEOPLE!
  8. Ask for a drink refill when your drink is full
    I'm good at my job. I'll watch your drink levels. I promise you, you will not die of dehydration!
  9. Dont tell me about an allergy
    I take you possibly dying pretty seriously. Letting me know before the plate is in front of you that you're deathly allergic to nuts is helpful.
  10. You let your kids do whatever they want
    I know it's hard taking kids out. But it's nice when a parent is trying as opposed to just sitting back and letting them run wild. It's not only annoying, it's a safety issue.
  11. Ask me anything personal that you would feel would be rude for me to ask back.
    How much do you make? How do you afford to live on your own? What do you make nightly in tips? Do your parents help you? Do you have to work two jobs? Are you in school? When are you going to get a real job? Are you doing this until you can start an actual career? How come you're not married? Oh no kids, why?
  12. They complain about things like...
    There's too much bread in my French toast, shes too sweet makes me feel like I need to watch my back, or I can't taste the alcohol in my tall vodka sunrise, easy ice (tall and easy ice doesn't mean more booze it means more mixer...), I didn't think the garlic chicken would have so much garlic (if it's in the name there's a good chance it's a main ingredient)
  13. Snap your fingers/shake your glass
    I once had an 8 top ring cowbells whenever they needed something. They were monsters.