TIMES I'VE GOTTEN PUNCHED

  1. 10 years old. At end of a hockey game while shaking hands w other team. Their coach says "You're not that good" (I had scored a couple goals). I say, "Suck my dick dude." He pops me with an open palm to the chin. I was wearing my helmet but he was like 40.
  2. 24. At work retreat. Boss strongly encourages us to get drunk. I do so and lose my shit. I tell boss "I think you may be a dickhead." My writing partner punches me in the face to try to cool me out. Too drunk to feel it. Keep acting like idiot.
  3. 33. Men's Hockey league. I lose my temper and stick a dude between his legs. He justifiably gets pissed and starts punching me in the head. "I'm sorry I'm sorry," I say but he keeps punching. I don't resist, knowing I deserve this.