MY INTERACTIONS WITH FAMOUS PEOPLE: CHUCK NORRIS EDITION

Bearded wonder, total badass, actor: Chuck Norris.
  1. In 1990, Chuck Norris founded Kickstart Kids, "Character through Karate."
  2. "KICKSTART KIDS is a nonprofit organization dedicated to giving middle school students the tools and support necessary to resolve conflicts, avoid participating in gangs, choose a drug-­free lifestyle, resist negative peer pressure, and remain in school until they graduate."
    I copied that off their website.
  3. "Students in the program achieve a higher level of academic success and ultimately become more productive."
    Their website, continued.
  4. Many years after 1990 (let's say 17 years or so), Chuck Norris had a meeting with the boss of my company to talk about Kickstart Kids.
  5. My office was close to the room where the meeting took place.
    My office was probably 10x10, but I had a covetable location. And a window! Ahh, the good 'ol days.
  6. So I hung around in my office doorway at the time the meeting was scheduled to end.
  7. (Just like the handful of other people in my corner of the office.)
  8. When the meeting ended, the doors opened and Chuck Norris came out of the room with my boss and a couple of other high-level staffers.
  9. The boss introduced me to Chuck Norris, and told him my job/title.
  10. Chuck Norris and I shook hands.
  11. Chuck Norris gestured at my boss and said to me "I hope he isn't working you too hard!" He chuckled.
  12. I chuckled softly.
  13. I wanted to say something witty.
  14. I wanted to joke around with Chuck Norris.
  15. Instead my mind went blank.
  16. I lost the ability to form words.
  17. AND I SHRUGGED.
  18. Chuck Norris gave me the briefest slight "WTF?" look before the boss' assistant introduced herself.
    Is Chuck Norris unfamiliar with rendering people mute with his mere presence? I'm not even some sort of Chuck Norris mega-fan. WTF indeed, Chuck Norris.
  19. And I continued to stand there smiling, still mute, while a couple of other people met him.
  20. Then Chuck Norris left the building.
  21. (He was shorter than I expected.)