THOSE TIMES I ALMOST DIED 💀

Inspired by @ListPrompts (Warning: some gross stuff ahead.)
  1. That time I fell in the pool.
    When I was very young, I fell into my aunt's pool. I have a very vague memory of struggling underwater before someone hauled me out.
  2. That time the helicopter I was riding in had a mechanical issue and nearly crashed.
  3. That time cheese saved my life.
    As a kid, I became very ill with some sort of flumoniachitis. (<---I made that word up. I think I had flu that turned into pneumonia and/or bronchitis.) I felt too sick to eat, and became even sicker and weaker. Our priest brought me some homemade cheese, hoping to encourage me to eat. I started eating again, got stronger, and lived.
  4. Those times I was in car accidents.
    None my fault; I was lucky to walk away. I still have some lingering anxiety about being a passenger in cars, despite being the driver in 2/3 of these accidents.
  5. And then there was that time a blood vessel in my throat ruptured. That's the story I'm here to tell.
  6. When the time came to have my tonsils out, I became obsessed with the idea of dying during surgery.
  7. I made my younger brother go in first.
  8. As I was being wheeled away into surgery, I turned around, looked straight at my mom, and said "If I die, it's your fault."
    I think I was 10? Also: obviously a delightful kid.
  9. I was not given enough anesthesia, and started to wake up during the procedure.
    Apparently I started trying to tear all the tubes and wires off.
  10. They overcompensated by giving me a little too much anesthesia.
  11. In recovery, as I was finally starting to wake up, the doctor came in and asked me how I felt.
  12. I sat straight up in bed and projectile-vomited all over him.
    💪🏻💪🏻
  13. Several days later, my throat started feeling strange.
    It felt like warm liquid was running down my throat.
  14. I walked into the kitchen and told my mom. I could barely talk because of the weird feeling. As soon as I'd gotten the words out, I ran to the sink and threw up blood. Twice. I was having trouble catching my breath.
  15. My Dad, just home from work, wrapped me in a towel and ran, carrying me to the car. My mom ran behind us with her yellow mop bucket.
  16. I kept throwing up blood in the car.
  17. My Ear/Nose/Throat Doctor met us at the hospital. They sat me down in what I remember as a dentist's char.
  18. I was sobbing and gasping and sometimes still puking. The doctor could barely get me to sit still to look in my throat.
  19. A nurse and my mom held down my arms.
  20. The doctor snapped "Look at me. LOOK AT ME."
  21. He leaned in close to my face and growled "If you don't stop crying and sit still, I can't help you."
  22. I was terrified.
  23. I opened my mouth very wide, and he cauterized the ruptured blood vessel in my throat. I could smell burning, but I was too frightened to move or cry.
  24. My mom, who was holding my left arm/hand fainted during the procedure.
    She crumpled like a leaf. A nurse had to revive her.
  25. I survived!
    Never saw that E/N/T doctor again. My mom requested one of his partners for follow-up.