HOW TO BE ME IN 5 EASY STEPS

Inspired by @nathanveshecco and a lot of other people before that also
  1. 1.
    When you wake up, immediately fill yourself with all the dread you can possibly handle while still being able to get out of bed
  2. 2.
    Give yourself a pep talk and/or practice an award acceptance speech in the mirror at least 4 times a day
  3. 3.
    Eat a bunch of rice
    Idk I just find myself eating rice a lot
  4. 4.
    Do two minutes of work, pick up your phone, check the same five social media sites over and over again until you realize you're supposed to be doing work, repeat until work is done (this will take you hours)
  5. 5.
    Cry in the shower every time
    This is a real thing that I do and I don't know why