WEIRD SHIT YOU HAVE TO PACK WHEN YOU'RE A PROFESSIONAL SICK PERSON
I'm about to head to Europe for 8 days.
- •A family sized box of Gushers in case I have a blood sugar low on any of the 75 flights I'm taking
- •Three different antibiotics in case I catch the Turkish flu
- •Two notes explaining my medical conditions
- •A medical ID necklace that makes me look like the Red Cross tagged me for death
- •So much extra medicine I expect to do time in a Turkish prison for drug smuggling
- •A heating pad because I'm 75
- •Icy hot cream. I am actually 29.
- •The Turkish and Icelandic words for "lupus", "juvenile diabetes", and "cancer"
- •I don't have cancer anymore but that card is good for at least 15 years post diagnosis
- •Maybe 10. Whatever. Shut up!
- •Uh. Wish me luck.