Things My Husband Said Today During and After Anesthesia And/or Pain Killers

So, the husband had carpel tunnel surgery this morning. It's been a comical day.
  1. Motherfucker!
    This would be how we all knew the drugs had kicked in.
  2. I'd like to look at your vacation pictures, but I don't have my glasses on. And I'm really fucking high.
    That anesthesia is a good thing.
  3. How did I get in this chair?
    You crawled off the gurney and into the chair, love. It was all you.
  4. Take me to Chick-Fil-A, wife.
    I'm just glad they moved his surgery up by a couple of hours. He's an utter toddler when he's hungry.
  5. I kicked the shelf.
    Yes, you did. And broke a candle holder all over the bed. Sigh.
  6. That's not how you cure meat.
    While watching a show on hog hunting. In his defense, this is something he actually knows.
  7. Fuck you, Siri.
    Poor Siri. She can barely understand him when he's not all jacked up on painkillers. Poor girl doesn't stand a chance tonight.
  8. You can't call me a ginger. That's racist.
    As the anesthesiologist and I were discussing my red-headed husband's history of problems with anesthesia, in response to the anesthesiologist was telling me that red heads really are more likely to have issues with anesthetics.
  9. Take me to tacos.
    Because Tuesday.