Titles for the Memoir I Will Never Write

Inspired by @kaitmaree
  1. "Wait, what?"
  2. How Sarcasm Made Me Sound Like an Asshole: What I Haven't Learned
    can't stop won't stop
  3. "Sorry I Just Need Some Coffee"
  4. "Sorry I've Had Too Much Coffee"
  5. When Everyone Thinks You're 15 and Other Annoyances
    I'm 22
  6. I Know You Don't Care About Behind The Scenes Facts and Trivia But I'm Going To Tell You Anyway