Houston is my number one burrito (for the new kids)
  1. We were in a graveyard and I said "have you ever kissed someone in a graveyard?"
    He leaned in and said "Not anyone living..."
  2. I told him I relate to raccoons and he said...
    "Oh please. You're way cuter than raccoons and the furthest thing from garbage."
  3. "I'm so strong I can not work out for years and still be stronger than you."
    Heavy on the sarcasm.
  4. "I thought about you all day today except for when I was eating cuz then I was thinking about food."
  5. (This one was without context)
    "I had a really good ham today. It was really tender. And fatty. That's how you know a ham is good."
  6. *coming to a sudden realization about fashion*
    "Wait...your shoes do matter."
  7. I asked him a question about something incredibly nerdy and he said:
    "I wouldn't know that, I'm not a nerd." *opens accounting textbook*