Because I'm on an airplane and waiting to fly. (You should probably also know that I'm flying United.)
  1. Sometimes airplanes are filled with hot air and a large crowd of passengers is forced to disembark. This makes me feel frustrated.
  2. When this happens, I need wine. Airport wine makes me feel: $25 less rich and 72% more sleepy.
  3. I feel discouraged when I crack open the plastic on my box of oily soba noodles ($10.99) but a little bit better when they join the potato chips I inhaled three hours ago on New Jersey Transit.
  4. I feel sorry for the flight attendants. People really are the worst.
  5. I feel a little warm again in my new seat. Is the air working? Are we going to make it this time?
  6. I feel like I need some more wine.
  7. I feel nervous when they tell me to put my phone away. "But my list!" Priorities.
  8. I feel stiff, as if I were 30 years older than I actually am. It's been 10 minutes and we're about to fly to the other side of a really big country. We're trapped.
  9. I feel jealous of the woman in first class who just requested sparkling, with ice.
  10. I feel the plane moving. This is real!