Because who am I kidding....
  1. I am very afraid of needles. When I have blood drawn I can't even watch.
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    Hence the no piercings/tattoos thing.
  2. I eat cereal for dinner.
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    And candy for dessert.
  3. My floors are filthy.
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    Dust, lint, and dog hair are basically my rugs. Can swifter please send me one of those big green boxes?
  4. There is log cabin syrup on my keyboard.
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    I just deal with the stickiness.
  5. I wear concert and graphic T-shirts to work.
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  6. I don't know when to use affect or effect, who or whom etc....
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  7. I can't help anyone with homework.
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    See above.
  8. I still like stickers and glitter nail polish.
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    I am too old to be shopping at Urban Outfitters.
  9. I can't fold a fitted sheet.
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    I just roll them up and throw them in the closet.
  10. I bite my cuticles. I know it is disgusting. It's a nerves thing.
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    Since every manicurist scolds me I feel this qualifies.
  11. I have turned many white shirts/sweaters pinkish in the laundry.
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    Fuck.
  12. I think fart, dick and poop jokes are funny.
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    I have the sense of humor of an 11 year old.
  13. Clueless on kitchen utensils. My Useless kitchen utensils ranked.
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  14. I can not gift wrap.
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