My most embarrassing moments
Inspired by @jeremysomething and many others. Enjoy!
- •The time I decided to put my gold bracelet on while sitting on the toilet.It fell in just after I 💩. 😱😱😱😱
- •The time I caught my neighbor jerking off yet didn't look away very quickly.Awkwardly stared like maybe just 2-3 seconds too long.
- •The Halloween where I turned out the lights and hid from trick o treaters because I ate all the candy weeks ago and forgot to buy more.Okay maybe this is every Halloween and yes they know I am home!
- •Lulu 🐶 and I both have Instagram accounts but only hers gets likes and followers.She has over 400 followers yet she does nothing. No tricks, no singing, no costumes.
- •I continue to let the regular Starbucks barista think my name is Karen for way too long because I am too tired/lazy to correct it and now I have to answer to Karen whenever that name is called to the bar.Super awkward when someone who knows me is also waiting for a drink. Or if there is an actual Karen there. This is my Elaine/Susie moment.
- •The time I violently threw up while in an Uber directly into my tote bag. The driver surprisingly said very little.Then had to bring the tote bag home! It was from J.Crew!
- •Accidentally bounced a check at my dentist office and they put a photo copy of it in my chart so the doctor could see it every time I had an appointment. I then "borrowed" my chart while no one was looking and threw the copy away.In my defense it was from my FSA account and I called them immediately to pay with credit card.
- •I ate Eggo waffles with syrup over my computer keyboard with no plate or napkin and now the keys are stuck.I actually still do this and just deal with it.
- •The "Saturday" from my days of the week underwear is... gulp....."missing" and I am too cheap to buy a whole new set.They are from Stella McCartney too!
- •I literally just learned what the term "Fluffer" means. Thank you Craig's List and Google.