1. About 10 years ago I was in a fight with a friend and our mutual friend said I had to apologize.
  2. "Why do I have to say I'm sorry? I didn't DO anything!" I growl-snarled.
  3. "It doesn't matter, he told me. "Apologizing will make things better."
  4. So I did. Apologize. And it was. Better.
  5. I started doing this as a rule. Even if I didn't think something was my fault, even if I wasn't sorry for anything I did, if I wanted to fix a fight or mend a relationship, I said I was sorry.
  6. Sorry doesn't have to mean " I'm sorry I did something wrong." Sorry can mean " I love you and I don't want to us to be on the outs and I'm sorry this is happening."
  7. When you apologize you're saying that the person you love is more important than your anger.
  8. And look, sometimes people AREN'T more important than your anger. And sometimes an apology can't fix what's broken.
  9. But you'd be amazed at how often it can.
  10. So apologize about that thing, whatever it is. Make amends. Set it right.
  11. As my parents said to me and my brother when we were elementary schoolers in the backseat scream-fighting over our one copy of THE SIMPSONS' GUIDE TO LIFE "Who's going to be the bigger person?"
  12. You be.
  13. Just some advice from your fun uncle Kit.