Things I have actually thought since I've started texting this guy

I'm not sure what to call him yet but I'll come up with a good nickname very soon so that I can call him by it instead of using his name
  1. Wow he looks kinda douchey
    But he says he likes disney movies so I guess I'll swipe right lmao
  2. Wow we matched time to never message him
    Oh wait, he messaged me...
  3. Okay he seems kinda cool
    He texts like an fboy but he hasn't said anything weird yet
  4. (Later) Oh great he's asking for my snapchat I guess it's time to get ready for unsolicited dick pics
    (Later still) wow I can't believe we've just talked and flirted a little bit and he hasn't sent any dick pics OR asked for nudes
  5. Okay I'm kinda interested and snapchat has his full name so let's find him on Facebook lmao
    (On Facebook) DANG he knows how to use his privilege for good and not evil like he's aware of all the social issues I care about
  6. Well, let's ask for his number
    Oh dang that was fast, let me take a screenshot so I don't lose it like I lose my glasses all the time
  7. Ok this texting is starting out pretty innocent
    We're just kinda play flirting and talking about nothing but this is cool
  8. OH WOW I'M BLUSHING A LOT
    And this isn't even that bad omg I'm so innocent and naive how is he making me so flustered
  9. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
    THIS BOY IS SMOOTH AS BUTTER AND I BLUSH A LOT
  10. Now I keep thinking about him because I am a garbage human™
    Mostly like, when are we gonna get coffee and stuff but also sometimes I wish I could just cuddle him
  11. Now I've made this list and now everybody knows how garbage I am for him
    Oops