FRUIT & FRUIT "FLAVORS": A COMPARISON

  1. Strawberry Flavored > Strawberries
    Some strawberries are awesome and some are terrible, whereas the strawberry-flavored item is always the best of the pack.
  2. Grapes > Grape Flavored
    Grapes are unreal. Grape-flavored things always suck and taste like cough medicine.
  3. Watermelon = Watermelon Flavored
    Both amazing, all the time.
  4. Oranges > Orange Flavored
    See grape v. grape-flavored analysis, except orange-flavored is always second-worst. Before grape.
  5. Berry Flavored > Berries
    This isn't the fair because it's easy to take the best berry flavors and just call it berry, but I'm picking a handful of Berry Skittles over a handful of fresh berries every damn time.
  6. Mango Flavored > Mangos
    Mango-flavored stuff always tastes like a tropical party in your mouth. Real mangos are a huge toss-up. I've had many bad mangos.
  7. Bananas > Banana Flavored
    Bananas are pretty great, easy to eat, good for you, etc. The ONLY banana-flavored item anybody seems to prefer are banana Runts. Otherwise, banana flavor sucks super hard.
  8. Blueberries = Blueberry Flavored
    Both suck a little if we're being honest. Team Blueberry you can come at me.
  9. Pineapple > Pineapple Flavored
    You don't see a lot of pineapple-flavored stuff, but it doesn't matter because the real thing is so, so good.
  10. Apples > Apple Flavored
    Apple-flavored items tend to be "Green Apple" which kind of sucks because that flavor is all sour and tart and real apples don't always have to be that way. Flavor-makers, take note: if you make something Fuji Apple-flavored, I will buy it and write a list about it.