Why...

  1. do I wear my damp robe/ towel in bed? Every guy I have ever dated is thoroughly confused/disgusted by this
  2. do Europeans squish their cheek on your cheek when greeting you? I don't know you - I don't know where your face has been. Brb I have to go wash my face.
  3. do I add a million things to my online shopping cart with no intention of purchasing any of it?
  4. do I openly talk to strangers about my latest (unexpected) Brazilian wax experience?
  5. do my Birkenstocks smell so bad?