UNSUBSTANTIATED OPINIONS I HOLD ABOUT MEDICINE
So I am hugely not into modern medicine in an oddly retrograde, anti-science kind of way. Here are some totally unsubstantiated things I think. Do not believe me; apparently it is dangerous and bad to think this way?
- •Pain is in your brainSometimes when I hurt I mediate on what that means, physically, and then laugh at the cosmic joke that such a minute electrical signal should debilitate me. I get intense pleasure out of turning pain signals into happy signals and sort of crossing wires in what must appear to the outside world as a really twisted, inverse nutso laugh at intense pain. I think this is also known as masochism.
- •When I get ready to die, I do not want to be anywhere near a hospitalI'm hoping for some kind of blunt trauma that just sort of obliterates me but I guess that is ever more rare. Having been in hospitals, they are just not nice places. I'll stay put I think.
- •Motion is the lotionI read this about sprains and basically took it to mean that I should never immobilize any part of me to repair it. Kind of goes along with the good kind of pain.
- •One can subconsciously affect the intensity and direction of one's immunological responseOK so this is in nutso territory but I think it's true. Concentrating/meditating on injuries and illness has always helped me in the past in a totally non-quantifiable, non-empirical way. Once I had a wart that I thought away.
- •Stitches and butterfly bandages are close substitutesEver since I cracked my head open on the playground in rural Nigeria as a kid I have respected he butterfly bandage. Super glue comes in as a close second.
- •Babies/children should be quarantinedNot sure if this is totally a mis-addition to this list, but babies appear to me to be massively infected with, obsessed with, and controlled by bacteria, viruses and illness. And I do not have the benefit of breast-milk induced immunological superiority. So no, I will not touch your baby. Thank you.
- •The vast majority of doctors over-treat illness in a stifling, agency-reducing wayIf you ask a doctor a question, 9/10 they will recite to you a variety of facts from a medical textbook and tell you about a medical procedure that you should probably undertake, just to be safe.