Thoughts I Had While Applying for My First Job

  1. Why am I doing this?
  2. I'm so poor
  3. Why is money a thing? Can we just go back to bartering? I'd be happier if I could just trade a goat for a cart of apples and bread
  4. Is there a job where I don't have to talk to people?
  5. What skills do I have
  6. "MOM IS SLEEPING A SKILL?"
  7. Do I like meeting new people? Hell no. I'll put yes
  8. Why would I want to be a member of corporate, I haven't graduated high school
  9. Can I put babysitting as past job experience even though I was slightly fired
  10. Is this really worth it
  11. Oh god if I get this job I'll have to go out in public a lot
  12. I just wanna crawl back into the womb and not have to worry about this
  13. I should get paid for getting through a conversation without hitting someone. I should not put that on my application
  14. What if someone tries to shoplift? I'm so weak and I have so little endurance I could not stop them
  15. If I get this job I will never get to see anyone I love ever again and I will have no free time I will probably die here
  16. Oh ew I'm going to have to do homework and this
  17. Anyone who balances taking care of a family, college, and work should get $372829394
  18. Oh good only THIRTY QUESTIONS LEFT
  19. Bless I can see the finish line
  20. Look how adult I am, I applied for a job that I probably won't get. Go me. I'm being such a functioning member of capitalism. Good job.