Things Elise says

This simplest things said are only funny because they come out of Elise's mouth
  1. "Kasey, if it wasn't against my morals or it wasn't illegal... and if I could smoke pot with anyone in the world, it would be you."
  2. "Well in Ohio we..."
  3. "Awwww man, there's cheese in my yogurt"
  4. *i walk in the dorm from 8am* Elise- "hello. I I fear I'm running a bit behind this morning"
  5. "What if a prince in tights just climbed up the tree to our widow?"
  6. "KASEY."
    You can take this as an excited expression or an annoyed one, because it's been used for both.
  7. "I'm dropping out and becoming a nun, my name is going to be Sister Agnes"
  8. "My high school colors were gold and brown.. it represents corn and dirt"
  9. "I wish I was made out of animal hooves"
  10. *elise laughing, "it's a guinea pig having an existential crisis"
  11. "We can play water pong?"
  12. "How scary would it be if you had to live with a muppet?"
    Wow, thank goodness muppets aren't real!!! So scary!
  13. *elise dying laughing* Me: what Elise? Elise: a t-Rex is tucking a dog into bed
  14. "Today I bumped into a fridge and then apologized to it"
  15. "Kasey, you're like the hamster having an existential crisis"
    What.
  16. *Elise gets out of the car* "BEEEEEEEE WOOOOOO! Sorry, I was just announcing our presence"
  17. "Today, I saw a large squirrel and I thought it was a cat, so I went to pet it but then it ran away. I was sad because I didn't get to pet it and that's when I realized it was a squirrel"