OVERHEARD AT THE LIBRARY

We've all heard something weird..
  1. "So I said to him, 'no homo bro, but this is the BEST chicken I have EVER had.'"
  2. "You really don't remember? We got back and you gave 3 of the RA's enormous hugs and told them you missed them."
  3. "Shit, but if I bring it to IT will I get in trouble for all the porn I downloaded?"